Mother of the Bride Spot

Random thoughts on being a Mother of the Bride...although since we are now past The Wedding, perhaps this would be better titled Random Thoughts On Life In General...

Sunday, November 27, 2005

Six Days....

Let's see: if God created the world in 6 days, surely we'll be able to pull off a mere wedding in that period of time.

On the other hand, it was more likely 6 epochs or eras. We only have 6 24 hour days.

On the third hand, I'm definitely not God.

On the fourth hand, there really isn't all that much left to do, believe it or not.

We had a wonderful Thanksgiving with the entire family -- Jill, Derrick, Deven, Chris, Torrey, Tim and the two oldsters. The house is (mostly) decorated for C'mas. My office looks as though a cyclone has hit it.

But then, it usually does.

We did the bowling tradition -- this is Chris' first Thanksgiving with us, so he was new to all that we do. Deven "bowled" with lots of help from his parents. Only had a few balls stuck in the alley. Our friends, Judy & Harold with son Kevin joined us for bowling and then for dessert afterwards. Since we all only bowl once a year, it is truly a fun time, and there isn't any competition. Well, not MUCH competition.

I will modestly declare as the old lady of the group, I got the high score of the night: 165. Bob came in second with 161. Nice to know we were able to beat out all the youngsters!!

We've even had time to watch a couple of movies. Napoleon Dynamite wins for the all around dumbest flick of them all. Goooooosssh!

Chris heads back to Indy today. Tim goes back to school for three days and then comes home for the wedding. Chris will be back on Thursday night. Torrey is home with us for the week.

I'm really glad to have this bit of time with her.... we talked about it for a few minutes last night, and -- true confession -- we both shed a couple of tears.

Why is it that happiness can bring on tears?

Sniff.

Friday, November 25, 2005

Adam's Wedding

A week ago today we (Torrey, Chris, Tim, Bob and I) were enroute to Asheville, NC to attend the "destination" wedding of Adam & Missy. The wedding was to take place at Lioncrest which is part of the Biltmore Estate. Lioncrest is a converted barn - which may not sound all that wonderful, but truly, it is Beyond a Barn....a Barn to Behold! Linda & Will (Adam's parents, and our close friends) and Peggy & Don (Missy's parents) demonstrated the epitome of Southern hospitality and graciousness....

We checked into the hotel where almost all the guests were staying to be ushered to a hospitality suite with drinks and snacks -- a place where anyone who wanted to hang out, could. Adam was holding court there, and it gave us an opportunity to begin to introduce Chris to some of our non-biological family.

The rehearsal dinner was a rather formal affair -- we had gotten special invitations, and about 75 of us gathered together at "My Beloved Homewood" that meal. Linda did an amazing job with the table decorations -- how I wished I could have transported her candle holders back here to Wheaton to use on our tables for the reception! She and Carole put it all together in the afternoon. A bus had been hired to take us to the dinner -- a bus which couldn't make it up the hill to the Homewood -- so they had to send another one! Needless to say, dinner was just a little late since all the guests weren't there! But it wouldn't be a wedding without something memorable happening!

Saturday was cool and sunny -- certainly warmer than it was back here in Chicago, but not quite just sweater weather yet. We were treated to a continental breakfast in the lobby area, and then we headed for a tour of the Biltmore Estate -- one of the "gifts" to the guests from Missy's parents.

What an amazing house! 101 bedrooms, 43 bathrooms (in an era in which many people didn't have bathrooms at all), lots of sitting rooms, a two lane bowling alley, exercise room and swimming pool. Overall, I found that the ambience of the home was a lot warmer than we remembered from the Hearst Castle which we toured several years ago. The view, of the mountains is gorgeous!

We also went to the winery for a tour (brief) and wine tasting -- even Bob tried a couple of the wines!

By the time we got back to the hotel, it was time to get ready for the wedding. This time, the buses didn't break down -- there just weren't enough of them, so that we, the guests, were late for the wedding which ended up starting at 6:30 instead of 6:00. But it was beautiful! The ceremony, conducted by a Lutheran pastor, was God honoring and personal to Missy and Adam.

Following the ceremony was an excellent dinner with food stations - a meat and mashed potatoes (I've never had mashed potatoes in a martini glass before!!) station, a seafood and sushi station, and a vegetables, cheese and bread station which I never got over to. It was so much fun just visiting with people and being with family and friends.

The reception was back down in the area where the ceremony was held. Great music, dancing and just SO much fun!

Sunday morning we took our three kids to the airport where they ran into Missy and Adam who were on the same plane to Charlotte. They spent their layover time together, having breakfast as a big group. Then Missy and Adam headed for their honeymoon in the Dominican Republic while Torrey, Chris & Tim went back to a slightly more prosaic Indianapolis.....

Bob and I drove around Asheville a bit, then went back to the hotel for the brunch Missy's parents provided.

What was really fun was saying goodbye to our extended family -- able to say to them, "see you in two weeks!"

And now, it is only one week and one day until OUR event. The county offices are closed, so our children do not have a marriage license....hopefully there will be no snafus on that end of things so they can pick it up next Friday -- the day before the wedding.....

That's just cutting it a bit close I think.

But hey! The seating chart is done!!

Tuesday, November 22, 2005

The 42nd Anniversary

Many folks remember that today is the 42nd anniversary of the assassination of John F. Kennedy. Most of us can remember exactly where we were and what we were doing when we heard the news that he had been shot.

But how many of us remember that today is also the 42nd anniversary of the death of Aldous Huxley -- author of Brave New World?

More importantly though -- today is also the 42nd anniversary of the death of C.S. Lewis -- Christian author and philosopher that has has impacted far more lives around the world than either of the other two. Lewis' writings continue to be amazingly influential -- witness the December unveiling of the first book in the Chronicles of Narnia -- The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe. I was just 11 when I was first introduced to Peter, Susan, Edmund, Lucy, Mr. Tumnus, the White Witch -- and best of all, to Aslan. I've read the series over and over and still can't decide which of the books is my favorite....I love them all.

Lewis wrote many other incredible books that are favorites of mine: Mere Christianity, Screwtape Letters, his space trilogy, The Great Divorce, (if you haven't read that one, do pick it up -- it'll give you a new view of heaven and hell....), Letters to Malcolm, and too many others to list.

Lewis' death went virtually unnoticed here in the United States 42 years ago -- overshadowed as it was by the untimely demise of JFK.

Camelot was short lived.

But Narnia will remain forever!

Showers of Blessing....

A bit over a week ago, two of my dear friends, Debbie & Judy, along with daughter Jill gave Torrey a lovely bridal shower. I don't know who was more excited over this -- the bride or the MOB. It was a Saturday morning brunch at Debbie's beautiful Victorian home around the corner from us. The food was delicious, the presents were plentiful, pretty and practical -- but the best part was the guests.

Most of them were friends from church that have watched Torrey grow from a four year old preschooler to the poised, articulate, and beautiful young woman that she is now. Virtually all of them have prayed for Torrey at one time or another.

Two of my nursing school/Wheaton College classmates were there -- I've known them longer than I've known my husband! In fact, the three of us had babies within two months of each other that auspicious year in 1978 when Torrey was born.

I think the thing that struck both of us was the number of years of solid, God-blessed marriage represented in that room. Twenty women -- not a single divorce. One of our friends was married at College Church just last year -- another recently celebrated her 45th anniversary.

The one thing I wish we had done, (but didn't think of it) was for each of us to bring one of our wedding pictures. Given that most of us have been married somewhere around 35 years, that would have been so much fun! We did that last January in our life group -- what a hoot!!

I'm so grateful God brought us back to Wheaton 23 years ago -- that He put us in this community, and most especially into this church with this amazing group of friends that have been so faithful through the years.

I pray the same for Jill & Derrick, Torrey and Chris -- and someday, for Tim.

Thursday, November 17, 2005

On getting sick

Yesterday Torrey went home from work with what we are hoping is only the 24 hour flu. By the time she left the school where she is a therapist at 1:30, 6 kids had gone home with the same thing. Since we have Adam & Missy's wedding this weekend at the Biltmore Estate in Asheville I'm praying that is all it is....

Anyway, Chris e-mailed to ask what he should get at the grocery store that would help Torrey feel better -- what food would remind her of home? What a wonderful question -- and what a GREAT thing to ask your MIL2B.....

Folks, take note. It's that sort of request that will endear you forever to your spouse's mom.

Lipton's Chicken Noodle soup, tea and buttered toast with vegemite. Always, only, and forever.

If you are thinking it should be homemade chicken soup -- well, isn't Lipton's homemade? You have to dump the package contents into water and boil for at least three minutes, stirring periodically -- that qualifies it as homemade in MY book.

And the vegemite should be very thinly spread.

If you are having a hard time with the vegemite, you can get it in Australia (lots of ongoing discussion about which is better -- marmite or vegemite. In our house, vegemite wins hands down. Jill is the only one that likes marmite. I do too, but I prefer vegemite. We've started Deven on it too).

Torrey felt good enough to e-mail me later in the evening -- said Chris was treating her like royalty. I opined that she was royalty. If I'm Queen of Cabbage, that should make her Princess of -- oh -- Brussel Sprouts.

Wednesday, November 16, 2005

16 days.....

Christopher IM'd me today reminding me that it is only 16 days (like I'm not practically counting the hours I have to get everything done), and wondered what I would do with the blog since I have just over two weeks left.

Told him that as far as I was concerned, I was "the MOB" for at least a year after the wedding....since I think technically the bride and groom are considered such until next December...

So there will be more postings.

What I wanted to know was what on earth we'd e-mail about after all the wedding preparations were over and I could stop nagging about calling the folks that have not yet responded (you DON'T want to know how many there are!!), or having the bride and groom help with the seating for the reception -- how do I know who sits with whom? I'm still of the mind that alphabetical order is the best way to do things....

Chris thought we'd probably have some things to talk about.

Like books, maybe??

Postmodern Christianity?

Following Jesus in a world falling apart?

The job market for a school social worker in the Chicagoland area???? !!!! (Might need to pull out the duct tape -- purple, of course -- for that one).

I'm sure we'll find a few things to talk about. I've already scheduled my first visit. It isn't until the end of February. I'm wondering if I can wait that long....

I'm sure THEY can!

16 days? Yikes!!

Friday, November 11, 2005

Just RELAX!!

Funny how many people say this in one context or another. In the birthing/breastfeeding world, we use it a lot. Mom in labor -- "just relax through your contractions....", Mom breastfeeding -- "Relax -- it helps the milk flow...." Mother of the Bride -- "Relax -- it will all get done!!"

Relax! Just relax!! Makes me want to slap myself upside the head and say,

"Oh -- Relax!! Of course!! Just relax! Why didn't I think of that!! What a dummy I've been all along. Never occurred to me to just relax!"

I'll take it under advisement.

And during my next mental list making session at 3:30 am, I'll be sure to just --

RELAX!!

Thursday, November 03, 2005

Only One Month....

Wow. Last April 1, it seemed as though December 3 was a long time away...and here we are, less than 30 days to go. We can measure the remaining time in events, as in this is the last weekend we don't have anything scheduled until the big day. Next weekend is Torrey's shower, given by my very dear friends Debbie and Judy and daughter Jill. The weekend after that is Adam & Missy's wedding in Asheville -- then Thanksgiving -- and -- then -- it's here!

I'm doing my best work in the middle of the night. Insomnia is good for everything but getting sleep. When we get up in the morning, Bob wants to know what I accomplished at 3:00 a.m. Sometimes it isn't anything more productive than worrying -- if worrying can ever be productive. In the wee sma's today it was -- did we schedule enough time for the rehearsal so that we'll have enough time for a relaxed rehearsal dinner before we have to be out of the church? I'm glad Jenn will be there for both events to keep us on track!!

So I worry, and Torrey has typical pre-wedding jitters. I wonder if Bach's Rescue Remedy would help either of us. Hmmm.....

The printed program is nearly done. Well, it is MOSTLY done. There are name tags to do for the rehearsal dinner so everyone knows who everyone else is. And of course, the place cards for the reception -- which can't be done until we know who all is coming. That means, of course, figuring out a seating arrangement. I'm tempted to just put everyone at tables in alphabetical order. Wouldn't that be a kick? We could really mix it up and seat everyone in alphabetical order according to FIRST name!

Or, we could do what Southwest Airlines does -- the first 8 to arrive at the reception are at Table 1, the second 8 at Table 2 and so on. The stragglers would be in the hinterlands.

It would certainly be easier.

But I'm not sure it would make people very happy.

I guess I won't do it that way.

Too bad -- cuz it would be a no sweat solution to a big job!!

Hey EC, whaddya think??? ;>D