Montrose....

I'm leaving tomorrow morning before the crack of dawn for....MONTROSE! I am SO excited!

I need to explain Montrose....

It is a small Pennsylvanian town in the "foothills of the Endless Mountains" as my mother was fond of describing it. "2000 population and 2000 elevation..." (I'm not sure of either, but it sounds good and is easy to remember). One thing we do know is that it was a summer enclave for rich Philadelphians who wanted to get away from the heat of the city. Drive down Lake St and the white Georgian homes of yesteryear will conjure up the clip clop of horses and buggies, ladies in lawn shirtwaists with large hats going to take tea with a neighbor, butlers and maidservants bustling around, and, of course, Mary Roberts Rinehart mysteries.

Our family (Mother, Daddy, Rosie, Rick, Lyn & I) went there for the first time in 1960. We stayed in the upstairs apartment of a huge house on High St. Daddy was visiting missions in South America, and he wanted to get us out of the heat of Detroit. Lao Lao (old old -- or the mother's mother in Chinese) and Granddaddy were going to be there as they had come home permanently from Korea. They would be living in Torrey Lodge so we would get an entire summer with our grandparents.

The upshot of the whole thing was that Mother and Daddy purchased an old (very old) log cabin (REAL log cabin) that Mother had lived in the summer of her 13th birthday. For years we came back to that falling down log cabin the day after school ended, and didn't go back to Michigan until the day before school started.

Mother and Daddy eventually bought land and built a home there where they lived until Daddy went home to be with Jesus, and mother married Amos, then moving to Bethany Village in Mechanicsburg, PA. Mother had the old cabin razed, building a new, modern, winterized one on the very spot.



Our families went back, summer after summer. Rosie and I and all the children would meet up there for two to three weeks, never missing the Blueberry Festival. It is Lyn and Tim's home when they are in the U.S. on home assignment from Berlin.

The fall of 2001 we rented the cabin -- and lost it to a fire.

I've not been back since then.

We had it rebuilt by the same builder that did the second cabin.

Rosie has been the prime mover and shaker for getting it built, with Lyn putting many of the finishing touches on it this year when she was home.

This is the first time I have been able to go.

I can't wait.

Lyn, Tim, Timothy, David & Rebecca will be there. Rosie, Rob, Helen Clare, Liz Anne and The Boyfriend will be there. (The Boyfriend is a Big Deal. No one is invited to Montrose unless it is a Big Deal!!), Rick and Susan are coming on Saturday.

I'm going alone. Bobbert can't come because of his new job. Timo can't come because of his new job.

But I'm going.....

I can't wait.

Anniversary Thoughts....

Today is our 36th. It's hard to believe it has been that many years....two years longer than my mother and father -- Daddy went home to be with Jesus when they had been married about 33 1/2 years, but not quite as long as Bob's parents who had been married just over 40 years before Mom died.

Wow -- how can it be possible?

So many years....and they have been GOOD ones! Three wonderful children have come to us and now two super sons in law and one amazing grandbaby. We are truly blessed.

36 years ago our little wedding was planned for 7:00 at my parents' home in Michigan. It was to be an outdoor wedding -- June 26, right? No problem! And since Michigan is on the western edge of the eastern time zone, it would stay light long enough for the festivities. We didn't have much money -- in fact, I figured out at one point that our entire wedding cost somewhere in the neighborhood of $700. I borrowed my wedding dress from my dear friend Marilou -- my roommate in nursing school and college -- the veil from someone else. Flowers were daisies -- the least expensive -- and they matched my dress. We only had a small bouquet for me and a basket for each of my two bridesmaids.

Of course, the day turned out to be cold and rainy. So my mother, bless her heart, moved everything indoors....and it turned out to be lovely.

And it has stuck. 36 years later...

We were married on my grandparents' wedding anniversary. They were married June 26, 1913 -- it was a Wednesday, which was a customary day to be married back then. We chose that day because I am Lao Lao's namesake. They were married 57 years before he died. We are now on year 93....

I can remember meeting someone after we had been married for about 6 months who had been married 5 years, and thinking how LONG that was....

36 years later...

The wedding is not about the event -- it is about the marriage.

It's been good.

Thank you, my sweet Bobbert!!

On Journaling

A long long time ago -- about 35 years, 11 months and 20 something days, I used to keep a journal. It was an on and off sort of thing -- not terribly regular, but pretty prolific when I did write. I evidently thought I had something terribly important to say (so what else is new, you think). But the journal was for my eyes and my eyes only. I would have been devastated -- mortified -- humiliated beyond words if someone had found and read it. I started when I was about 13 or 14 -- in high school -- and stopped just before I got married.

I tried to journal a few more times after I was married, but I couldn't. I had nothing to say. It was as though whatever had been burning inside of me to be revealed by the written word had been subsumed by living with my dear husband.

In short, I didn't need that outlet any more.

Periodically I tried keeping one of those "Line-a-Day" diaries, but generally they fell by the wayside as well. I currently do have one that has four lines for each day for 10 years. When I got it three years ago a friend posited that I was being awfully optimistic, wasn't I? None the less, I have kept up with it for 2 1/2 years now, and it is interesting to go back and see the entries from 2004 and 2005. Entries to anyone but me are going to be pretty boring: "No new moms today. Got the lecture for Building Bridges pretty much done. HOT! and sticky today. Grilled outside for dinner [though I've never figured out what a grilled outside tastes like]. Had those great steaks from Costco. Tim is definitely the best griller." As I said, boring.

Anyway, Torrey started journaling when she was 14. She has dozens of notebooks filled with her thoughts and feelings. I would often find a pretty notebook and buy it for her to journal in. Made a great anytime present. And there is nothing like starting to write in a nice clean notebook.....

Anyway, remembering my own experience with journaling and marriage, I wondered if she too would lose the need and desire for journaling once she got married -- and suggested that she might. She wasn't so sure.

Last week when I was there and we were in Meijer, I saw the prettiest little notebook -- "Torrey, do you need a new one for journaling?"

She laughed and said she hadn't journaled since she got married.

"You didn't tell me so, you just said might," she said.

What is it about marriage that took away that need?

I guess if nothing else we are saving trees.

Blogging, of course, is totally different matter.

On Visiting the MC

It was a good week. Carole and I did our last Certification Cram Course for the year in Bloomington IN. The group was delightful -- and we found the food in Bloomington to be VERY good. I recommend the Malibu Grill if you happen to be in the neighborhood. We're ready to go back any time!

But the best part of the cram course was driving up to Indy to spend Thursday afternoon and evening with the MC. The Dumpling is as Dumplingish as ever. Very cute and cozy. The kitties are friendlier. The leaking hot tub is gone, and in its place is a fire pit. Over to one side of the deck is the hammock we gave Chris for his birthday. A fabulous piece of Murano glass from Venice -- a gift from hair stylist Gary adorns the bookcase in the entryway. Other than that, it looks much as it did when we were there over Tim's graduation.

Watching the MC interact is a joy. They treat each other with gentleness, respect, and consideration. Please and thank you, and would you mind....Lots of humor... While the first year of marriage is supposed to be the hardest, it looks as though this MC has discovered some basics of compatible dailiness of living. Good for them -- and may the second six months be even better than the first!!

We ran up to Costco and bought steaks for dinner which we had along with grilled asparagus. Chris is a WONDERFUL cook! I was going to pay for everything but discovered that (a) you either have to have your checkbook or (b) remember your pin number for your debit card. I didn't have (a) and couldn't remember (b). That is to say it wasn't the number I thought it was. So we had to limit our purchases to the cash that Torrey had as Chris didn't have his wallet, and I was down to a tidy sum of $10.38.

That WAS enough cash though for me to treat us all to absolutely delicious ice cream cones at Handels after dinner however. I can definitely recommend the Snappy Turtle.

In the morning I was able to watch what Torrey refers to as their "kitchen dance" as both make their lunches and prepare for the workday.

It was an easy trip home -- not much traffic, even on 80/94 and I294 -- made even easier by reflecting on how very happy I am to be able to share even a few hours with my dear MC.

Way Cool....

We are close to our 36th wedding anniversary -- June 26, actually. So here we are as newlyweds:



Cute, huh?

So then I went to my friend Rebecca's site -- Random Musings -- and shamelessly borrowed this idea from her....



Get your own countUP at BlingyBlob.com


Betcha would have never guessed we've been married THAT long!

My Florida Grandbaby

Jill sent some pictures yesterday...here's my Floridian grandbaby....



Jill keeps him in a life vest at the beach as he LOVES to run headlong into the ocean!

Looking cool in his shades....



Here's their condo complex where they will be living until their home is done. Jen, Deven's godmother and one of Jill's best friends traveled down with them to help with Deven on the four day trip. Bless her!!!

"Hi Grammie!"

Deven still hasn't quite figured out this whole talking-on-the-phone business. Jill said that while they were coming home from church he wanted Grammie and Papa so she said she'd call us when they got home. Bob isn't home yet -- he's teaching the 4 1/2 year old "Pandas".

But Deven did manage "Hi Grammie!" just as clear as anything. Nothing more than that yet, but he'll learn.

And Bob will call him when he gets home so he can say hi to his Papa.


But it just isn't the same as them coming over after church here in Wheaton. No little boy arms hugging me around my neck. No little voice exclaiming, "Papa! Papa!" No visits to the tupperware cabinet to find just the right size hat.


I'm sure they are where they need to be right now --

I'm sure.

I'm ....

Are they?

How the Other Tenth Lives...

Last Saturday The Bob and I went to a benefit for Wellness Place in Barrington. Barrington is one of those towns that you might drive through on a Sunday afternoon to see the mansions -- except you can't see them, hidden as they are behind trees and fences. Barrington is new money and new homes. The North Shore is old money and old mansions. Wellness Place is a place for cancer patients, survivors and families to come for education, empathy, and support. It runs on donations -- hence the benefit. "Tasting D'Vine" was held at one of these very mansions. It was limited to about 450 people since the owners didn't feel as though their grounds would handle many more than that.

So why are we coming from the hinterlands to attend this gala affair? Bob is -- are you ready for this -- Chairman of the Board. I'm quite sure this is the first time they've had anyone from as far away as lowly Wheaton on their board, let alone Chair...

When Bob goes to meetings, Madame Blueberry (the Saturn) is rather out of place among the Jags, Beemers, Lexus, Lincolns, Mercedes, and all the rest of them. For this one I told him we really needed to take the Beast. The Beast is my 1997 Lincoln Town Car which we bought off the funeral home parking lot nearly 3 years ago. It had 140,000 miles on it, and we figured as long as it would get us through Tim's graduation, it would be fine. It holds 6 in the car and 4 in the trunk, quite comfortably.... But I digress.

The gala was appetizer sized tastings of foods from restaurants around the Barrington area -- there must have been 25 or more represented, plus wine tastings. Then there was the auction -- 12 donated items, auctioned to the highest bidder. The dinner with some amazing chef coming to your home and cooking for 10 people went for $10,000. I can't even imagine.... What on earth would you even begin to eat and drink that would approach that kind of money? Doesn't matter -- it is a benefit. There was the evening sail on Lake Michigan anytime between June and September with appetizers and cocktails. (I'm sure I should call them hors d'ouevres, but I can't spell it....). I think that went for about $5,000. The evening in LA at the Tonight Show sitting where you can high five Jay Leno....airline tickets and hotel included. Two large and very nice (I presume) bottles of wine. A golf outing. A plum seat to watch the Cubbies defeat the Tigers. (Well, we can always hope). And a trip to Tuscany to stay in a villa for a week. That one went for over $20,000. Airline tickets NOT included.

Just in case you were wondering, no, we didn't bid on any of these.

I'm always a little uncomfortable at these gigs. We've now been to three of them -- last fall it was at the Arlington Race track, and the year before that it was at another mansion. At least that time we were allowed to tour the house which was amazing.

I never know quite what to wear. And while Bob hugs and air kisses all the ladies he knows, I shift from one high heeled sandal to another (never again, let me assure you), smiling and hoping I look really really interested. It IS interesting seeing what the women are wearing at these affairs -- sorta like a fashion show. Some wear more, um, than others. The gaudy diamonds are fun. I wonder if anyone noticed that I was wearing my $15 "amythest" ring?

We have another of these in July -- it's a golf outing with a dinner. Since all The Bob and I do is putt putt and that's not what it is, we are going to the dinner.

I still don't know what to wear.

I wonder if anyone will want to talk about breastfeeding?

Whaddya think?

Taylor Tragedy Revisited

By now I think virtually everyone knows of the unbelievable twist to the horrific van accident of April 26 that took the lives of four Taylor students and one employee. Tim's graduation on May 20 was punctuated by the memorials to the students -- giving of their diplomas to family members or friends -- and remembrances of each and every one of them.

On Wednesday (May 31) Tim told me about the mixup between Laura and Whitney....how it was Laura that had gone home to be with Jesus on April 26, and that it was Whitney that the VanRyn family had been caring for for the last 5 weeks.

I've read the accounts of what happened, and I've wept. I've seen the girls' pictures on TV, and I've wept. I've pulled up more stories on the internet, and I've wept. I've talked about the tragedy, and I've wept. This ending to the story has grabbed me -- along with the rest of the nation -- as the original van accident didn't.

Over and over we've cried out -- "how could that happen? How could they have mixed up the two girls -- even at the scene of the accident? How could Laura's family and friends care for Whitney for five weeks and not realize that IT WASN'T LAURA?

Oh -- explanations have been given -- the damage to Whitney's face, the fact that none of the Ceraks saw "Whitney" after the accident and the funeral was a closed casket. That the coroner didn't do his job; that once the misidentification had taken place, then it just continued -- until last Wednesday.

I weep for the VanRyn's, and I rejoice with the Ceraks -- for their daughter, who was lost to them -- is alive and getting well.

I can't help but wonder how Whitney is going to deal with all of this once she is fully cognizant of the entire story. There will be survivor guilt, of that I have no doubt. I'm sure we will hear bits and pieces as Whitney's sister is Tim's best friend's girlfriend. (Did you follow that?).

But most of all, I wonder how Laura's mother is doing, and my heart just breaks for her. I think of my two beloved daughters, and cannot fathom not recognizing them -- no matter how badly they have been injured. Torrey's blue/green eyes with golden flecks that defy description by color but which are identical to Chris'. The little twist of Torrey's lower bicuspid that refused to surrender to the braces. The tiny mole by her lower lip, Cindy Crawford style. I've been able to pick her out in a fuzzy picture taken from far away when she is dressed identically with 50 other U.S. Grand Prix grid girls. How would I not know her if I see her in a hospital bed? How could I not identify Jill's long and slender fingers which are a direct gift from her father, or the curliness of her honey-brown hair. Her amazing clear blue eyes. The distinctive shape of her nose which has been passed down from her great grandmother Torrey. I can't imagine that it could be possible that I wouldn't know them just anywhere.

And so I weep for Laura's mother. And I ask Jesus to surround the family with His love, His mercy and His grace. I wonder how Romans 8:28 fits into this -- how can this be one of those "all things" that are working for good in the lives of God's people.

We may never know this side of heaven. But I do know that further down in Romans it says that NOTHING can separate us from the love of God.

We can cling to that, even in times of sorrow and tragedy and disbelief that something like this can happen.

Thank you Jesus.