Mother of the Bride Spot

Random thoughts on being a Mother of the Bride...although since we are now past The Wedding, perhaps this would be better titled Random Thoughts On Life In General...

Thursday, August 11, 2005

Happy Birthday, Jilly!



This completes our roster of family birthdays for this year -- except for mine, which can go unnoticed and unsung, if you get my drift. The SIL and SIL2B are both December birthdays. We did have a surprise half birthday party for The Beamer in June as the wedding is on his day....

Jilly was due on August 4, but somehow I *knew* she would be born on August 11. I also *knew* she was a girl. Since she's all of 31, that was before the days of ultrasounds and no one knew what they were going to have unless they had an amniocentesis. So I'm of the opinion, though I'm obviously in the minority, that one should wait until the moment of birth to discover the gender of your child. So much more exciting! When Deven was born, Derrick helped deliver him, and he was the one that told Jilly that they had a son. It was very special. I also *knew* Tim was a boy, but didn't have a clue early on as to what Torrey was.

Anyway, Bob asked me to please go into labor early in the morning after we both had a good night's sleep, and preferably not to labor too long. I told him I would see what I could do.

Ever the submissive and obedient wife (!!) I went into labor at about 5:30 am on August 11. She was born after an amazingly easy labor at 1:32 that afternoon. Was 5 cm when I got to the hospital about 9:30, and was putting on fingernail polish when I was dilated to 9. In those days, the husbands were kicked out of the labor room when mom had to start pushing (how stupid), but I was fortunate enough to have my sister Rosie with me as my "Lamaze coach." (I helped her figure out what she was supposed to do when she got to the hospital). Since she was an RN as well, they let her be with me.....

The only downside of Jill's birth was that she was a breech presentation -- butt first -- and the physician (my doc's partner) came in and announced in no uncertain terms: "I don't deliver a breech without a spinal!" So I had to have a spinal. That was AWFUL. I hated him for years after that. He finally got back in my good graces when he did a "Saul on the road to Damascus" conversion experience about the whole birth experience and he and I set up the Family Birthing Center (out of hospital, alternative birth center) in 1979. He wasn't a midwife, but came pretty close, and was the OB that I chose to "catch" Torrey four years later.

Jill's birth was pretty low key compared to Torrey's -- and especially compared to the drama of Tim's -- but there is something that is absolutely amazing about having your first baby. Everything with the first is so new and exciting, and you want to do everything so RIGHT. And you make so many mistakes!

I've apologized to Jill for the mistakes I've made -- I think my mothering improved with each child -- but all first children are the practice ones. I was a first. My mother was a first. My grandmother (her mother) was a first, as was my great grandmother and great great grandmother. In fact, Jill was the 7th first child -- all daughters -- in a row. She broke it with Deven.

She's the first to go to school, to drive (!!), to date, to go to college, to get married (most often), to have a child -- and then you start practicing all over again on your first grandbaby, because now you are a grandparent for the first time!!

The only saving grace of course is that she too will have a first child, and she too will have to apologize for all the mistakes -- though to be quite honest, I don't see that she's making any!!

Anyway -- last two blogs a bit removed from the MOB theme -- but I did have to say, "Happy Birthday" to my favorite eldest daughter -- also a precious gift from the Lord!

1 Comments:

At 7:54 PM, Blogger Torrey said...

I absolutely love this one. And not that I have any experience as a mother myself, I hope that I learn a few things from Jill because I see what an amazing mom she is. Thanks for being such a great mentor. I love you Jill!

 

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