Mother of the Bride Spot

Random thoughts on being a Mother of the Bride...although since we are now past The Wedding, perhaps this would be better titled Random Thoughts On Life In General...

Tuesday, August 09, 2005

Happy 21st to the Timster

I woke up feeling a bit gloomy this morning. Since I'm not usually a melancholy sort of person, it took me awhile to figure out what my problem was. The fact is, I miss The Timster. Here it is, a major milestone in his life, and he's a third of the way around the world in Dublin! Now I'm not sure any red-blooded American young man wants to spend his 21st birthday with his PARENTS, but I miss him and wish he were home.

Come to think of it, I was just finishing up my senior year in nursing school on my 21st birthday -- my roomie and I went into Chicago, had dinner out, went to see Thoroughly Modern Millie (that dates me just a bit) and then caught up with some friends of hers. I don't think I missed MY parents one iota!

I love to think about each of the kids' birth days on their birthdays. I think each mother should have as many Mother's Days as they have children. I'd then have one on July 19, one on August 9, and one on August 11. I suspect pitching the idea to Hallmark wouldn't go over too well...

Tim's birth was definitely the most unusual. We planned on having him at home -- I had been the head nurse of an alternative birthing center in the Detroit area, and the thought of delivering in a regular hospital -- which is all that was available in 1984 in Chicago -- was more than I could fathom. So I found a wonderful midwife to attend me, planned out my music (remember, Torrey was born to the 1812 Overture), which consisted of all my Rod McKuen "Earth, Sea & Sky" records; asked a couple of friends to come -- one of whom had never attended a birth before (she had had only C/Sections); and thought things were pretty well under control.

Well -- they were -- until the heavens opened, the rains descended, the electricity went out, the midwife didn't make it, and Bob caught the baby. Debbie held the flashlight which was far more than she had intended; figuring her job would be to make peanut butter and jelly sandwiches for the girls and play Monopoly with them.

Meanwhile, all I could think of was, "Oh no, I'm the only one here that knows HOW to deliver a baby!" So in between pushes, I told Bob what he needed to do to help Timothy have a safe passage. Not what I had planned either! Linda, my midwife arrived about 10 minutes after Timothy did and attended to all the rest of the things that needed to be done. It was glorious!!

Lying in bed later that night with Bob on one side of me and Tim on the other, candlelight flickering on the ceiling, it occurred to me that despite the *plans* going somewhat awry, the birth couldn't have been any more natural and perfect. Staying home was so RIGHT.

Music? Well, about 20 minutes after Timmy was born, the rain stopped and the usual summer Thursday night band concert started in the park -- three blocks from our house.

Yes, happy birthday, Tim


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